I wish I could turn back time

Author: Anonymous
Baby Name: Jolie/Jonathon
Birth Date: June 1989
Abortion Date: September 1988

Dear child of mine,
If only I had stood my ground against your father you would be here today. Your sister and you would have been probably one year apart. But I was afraid that if I didn’t do it and went through with the pregnancy, your father would have abandoned us. I should have trusted God to take care of us because he still ended up abandoning us anyway. I think of you often and cry. I murdered you while you were in my womb. I was crying even before the doctor started and I could have told the doctor I had changed my mind but your father insisted. I was a big sissy back then. I idolized your father rather than God. I was such a fool. What I did to you is a burden I carry around all the time. I know God has forgiven me but I can’t seem to forgive myself. I hope to see you in heaven,God willing.
Love always,
Mom