Matthew: I cannot wait to meet you
Author: Kimberly
Dearest Matthew,
I was 19 years old but I so excited and frightened to find out you were growing inside me! I had been intimate with three different men so I was not sure who was your father. I was so ashamed but my high school sweetheart accepted the responsibility and asked his parents for the $500, cost of the abortion. He was getting ready to leave us for a career in The Air Force. He knew for sure that you were his baby!
I regret that day in 1987!
There were people protesting outside the “clinic”, they prayed and shouted that I’d spare your life, Matthew. I thought this is my choice, my body…please forgive me for not giving you a choice, my son.
Fast forward to 2014: I am 46 years old. I am married with 2 beautiful children and a wonderful Christian man. Jesus Christ is the center of our lives. I am a Neonatal Intensive Care Nurse 19 years now. I care and love babies tiny as you were, 24 weeks gestation, when I allowed you to be murdered. The Lord as brought me full circle my son.
Yet, you know this beautiful Savior already, don’t you Matthew? You have been with Him since the moment you were killed! This same Redeemer has forgiven your Mommy and I am so blessed to be washed clean. One day Son, we will be together with our Heavenly Father. Matthew, I serve The Lord because He loved me when I couldn’t love myself and I tell others about you and Jesus, to give other mommies hope.
I love you Matthew, always will!
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Nov 03, 2014 @ 16:05:50
Your story touched me and gives me hope that I can heal and continue on a good, faithful path. I often feel like a fraud in church knowing that my decision brought the end to a beautiful life.
I am also in a field surrounded by children, education. I look at them and wonder if I see any hint of my baby at all.
I wish you well, and continued healing.
Thank you.